Read Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child's Attitude, Behavior & Character in 5 Days by Kevin Leman Online

have-a-new-kid-by-friday-how-to-change-your-child-s-attitude-behavior-character-in-5-days

Shows parents how to reverse negative behavior in children - fast. Author Biography: Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known psychologist, humorist, and bestselling author of The Birth Order Book and Making Children Mind without Losing Yours. He is former consulting psychologist for Good Morning America and a frequent guest on The View, The Early Show, and Focus on theShows parents how to reverse negative behavior in children - fast. Author Biography: Dr. Kevin Leman is an internationally known psychologist, humorist, and bestselling author of The Birth Order Book and Making Children Mind without Losing Yours. He is former consulting psychologist for Good Morning America and a frequent guest on The View, The Early Show, and Focus on the Family. He and his wife, Sande, live in Tucson, Arizona. They have five children and two grandchildren....

Title : Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child's Attitude, Behavior & Character in 5 Days
Author :
Rating :
ISBN : 9780800732769
Format Type : Paperback
Number of Pages : 300 Pages
Status : Available For Download
Last checked : 21 Minutes ago!

Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child's Attitude, Behavior & Character in 5 Days Reviews

  • Lisa Topp
    2018-11-14 01:25

    By the end of the summer I was losing my mind with my older daughters, ages 9 and 7. This book suggestion popped up in a weekly e-mail, and I really needed new kids by Friday - if not sooner! A few chapters in, (I read more than one a day - I need to get the program going!)I really like the common sense approach, and the fact that you are shaping attitute, behavior and character - they are all intertwined. I started changing my approach already today, and we made it all the way to bedtime with no yelling or crying - hooray!!Now, seven days later, my house is a new place. I haven't raised my voice all week, my children have been apologizing for bad behavior, my three-year-old is staying in her bed at bedtime, and they are picking up after themselves. WOW. If you really stick to your guns, and FOLLOW THROUGH every time (with Leman's method of B doesn't happen until A is completed), instead of 'threaten' punishment (a mommy bad habit), the kids really learn that mom means business. Read this book if you really mean business, and are willing to be punished yourself a little bit (like, if you were going to take the kids to the movie, and you need to take away the movie,it does mean no movie time for you - not, well, we'll still do this one thing and then I'll take away the next thing.). Consistency goes a long way and I'm surprised at how quickly I earned my childrens' respect back. I've even seen a lot more hugs from my nine-year-old.I know new challenges will come, but these principals have prepared me to deal with them - and the cool question/answer section at the back of the book touches on topics I'll need to reference as the children grow. I think I've read my final parenting book - hooray!

  • Kimberly
    2018-10-27 23:25

    Confession--this was a book my husband INSISTED that I read, not one that I picked out by choice. I have to say that overall, I felt that Leman only made two valid points throughout the entire book, and that the rest was just filler (or letters from "grateful" readers, plugging this book). The first point that I felt merited some thought was to not encourage/engage in arguing with your child. Later, when they want some favor or treat, you say "no"--if they ask why, you explain--once--that you did not appreciate the way they spoke to you earlier. The second valid point, IMHO, was "B doesn't happen until after A"; obviously used for a variety of scenarios.I felt that most of this book was redundant after the first 1/3, merely hammering in points that the author already stated. If you actually pay attention to what you're reading, you've already gotten his points by then. It was also filled with "real-life situations" to simulate the points, that I felt were a complete waste of time. After all, everyone's situation is different, and what someone else's child says to their mother isn't the same things my child are saying to me. The biggest turn off (after the redundancy factor), was the letters from people exclaiming how great the book is--seriously, if it is that great, I don't need 1/2 of the book filled with other people saying that--just give me the facts.For 2 valid points, not really recommended.

  • Rachel
    2018-10-21 06:25

    Thanks to my MiL for getting this book for me. She was right...some of the ideas this guy uses are excellent. He is practical and has a down-to-earth approach to problems we all face as parents. That being said, I did NOT like all of his personal examples. They read a lot like this, "My children are so angelic. We are such awesome parents. We have never made a mistake and our children are perfect. Just listen to what my daughter/son did..." It was HIGHLY annoying! Common sense says that parents who might choose to read this book are struggling in one or more areas with their childrens' behavior and the last thing any parent in that situation wants to read is some psychologist gloating over how perfect his own children were and how it all came down to the fact that he and his wife were such perfect parents from day one! If you can overlook at least a dozen of those sickening examples of perfection, then you can find some good tips in the pages of this book. They did not negate the positive things to learn from this book (they were just annoying). Now all that's left is to perfect yourself (as the parent) so that your children can then perfect themselves based on your example. :)

  • Adriane Devries
    2018-11-06 23:18

    Dr. Kevin Leman’s title, Have a New Kid By Friday, fools parents into thinking that this book will change their kid’s rotten behavior, when in reality it is the parent who must change first. He knew no one would buy a book called “I’m a Lousy Parent, I Need A Fast-Track Remedial Course.” This hilarious book is a wonderful source of practical, easy-to-remember gems like, “Say it once, turn your back, and walk away;” and “B doesn’t happen until A is done.” Leman’s primary premise is that kids are born selfish and will do whatever works to get what they want. If tantrums get your attention, they’ll do them. If begging for money works, they’ll do it until they’re 35. It’s up to parents to not cooperate with their manipulative schemes and to instead teach them appropriate methods of dealing with and showing concern for others. He says that ultimately we show a child respect by expecting him enough to understand you the first time you say something, and that if he doesn’t follow through he should not expect the car keys, or the afternoon treat, or the play date at a friend’s house. It is our gift to them to raise them with their end result in mind: competent, responsible, healthy adults.

  • Rachel
    2018-11-13 23:33

    Dr. Leman makes some good points about setting the appropriate tone for a parent-child relationship, about boundaries and respect. In fact, I agree with most of his broader statements about kids and their needs. His "talk and walk away" approach is probably only effective with some kids, though. I think my personality is far to direct to get involved in child psychology. I've probably formed my parenting habits from my Mom, who was a pretty no-nonsense person. (She spoke as though our not doing something she had asked wasn't even a possible outcome.)One thing that stood out to be was a little section on shyness. His assessment of shy kids is WAY off. I was painfully shy as a child, largely due to fear and emotional immaturity. Shy kids need all the help they can get to gain confidence and overcome their fears, and telling them they're selfish is a bizarre way to do that.I've learned it's a very bad idea to back kids into a corner and force them to take steps on YOUR time table rather than theirs.I picked this book up thinking of my brother's children, actually. Their behavior is so bad my kids come home with a 'tude just from spending the night!

  • Christie Hagerman
    2018-10-26 05:28

    This has some good pointers overall, but most of it didn't apply to our particular family, since we're homeschoolers who don't have the typical American family/schedule. I liked the suggestions for practical consequences to unwanted behaviors but was disappointed at how many don't apply to us.

  • Rebecca
    2018-10-29 22:35

    Came close to giving it 1 star because parts of it were SO bad I almost didn't finish it. But I must reluctantly admit that his main message is powerful enough to be of help to many people:-say it once, then walk away-B doesn't happen until A happens-don't get angry (but apologize if you do)etc.However, his main points are buried in a book dominated by so many flaws that I found it painful to read. The most important of these flaws are covered by other reviews, but to list a few that bugged me:-the *main section* of the book is really only 1/3 of the total. Sounds like he didn't really have that much to say.-he should NOT assume that all shy children are being manipulative-his "advice" on manners boils down to "you should really teach your kids some". Wow.-he uses the phrase "purposive nature of the behavior" WAY TOO MUCH. Um, just say "purpose of the behavior" or even "reason they do that is...". We'll know what you mean and not feel you're trying to impress us.-he shouldn't be giving advice on when mothers should stop nursing their children-he should definitely NOT advice 5-year-olds to fling dog poop into the neighbors yard (was he kidding? I would probably assume yes...)

  • Megan Prather
    2018-11-18 01:15

    This book is so amazing. It has opened my eyes to a whole new way of thinking about parenting. Reality is a way better teacher than I will ever be and I have to remember to be more of a guide for my children rather than a tyrant. This helped me to understand the reasons my children behave and have the reactions they do! I love this book and recommend it to anyone who wants to treat their children better and have a better stress free life. My kids are 10 and 12 and even though we are just starting to change our parenting I was shocked with how quickly things began to turn around. I am so happy I found this book and already want to read it again! There is a handy glossary in the back for every day situations with examples and ways to handle them. I can't wait to read more from Dr. Leman!

  • Laura G
    2018-10-26 01:25

    In surfing bestsellers this came up. The title seemed so funny that I had to get more info.After reading the book and testing out some of the ideas in a modified way in my classroom, I have to say that this stuff really does seem to work as far as getting difficult kids to see that it is time for them to change. Not only did it give me some new techniques for working with kids, but the advice that really helped me was that of not feeling guilty about offering true guidance to kids, which sometimes comes in the form of hard lessons. No, not spankings, but learning where the line is in terms of helping a kid, and enabling him to just keep being stupid!

  • Becky Giovagnoni
    2018-11-01 04:38

    I didn't care for this book. He's a little too conservative for me, although that's not my main issue. My main problem with his parenting advice is that much of what he recommends to correct or change a child's behavior shame-based. He says if you allow your child to be in a situation where he is ashamed or embarrassed in front of his peers, he will quickly change his behavior. The LAST thing I want to convey to my children is a sense of shame. The main purpose of how I parent is to teach them that God wants them to live free of shame. Shame may be effective at changing a child's behavior, but at what cost? Years of therapy as an adult.

  • Chase
    2018-11-04 23:25

    Excellent resource that every parent should read! Even if you do not have a "trouble" child, this book gives excellent ideas of how to build good attitudes, behavior, and character in your children. It also helps you discover what kind of parent you are and what changes you can make in yourself to be a better parent!It is a helpful resource for anyone working with children as well. The techniques and lessons can be applied to the children you work with.

  • Tracy
    2018-11-09 06:38

    Eh...it was ok. The author's attitude was a bit off-putting. And while I love the idea of natural consequences, I think it is somewhat difficult to implement because not every situation really has a tidy resolution like this author implies. Still, it was a good common sense guide and a reminder to not play into my children's dramas.

  • Melissa
    2018-11-19 01:18

    Okay, I hate the title. I am all for accepting kids for who they are. But I have to say this parenting book was a good fit for me. I learned/was reminded of some very important things, especially how not to nag. AND it has really helped.

  • Tiffany Allen
    2018-11-07 23:13

    This is a good book to help you see what you need help on as a parent...oh I have so much to learn!

  • Sylvester
    2018-11-06 01:20

    A surprisingly simple and common-sense book for the off-hand title. I keep failing on one of the most important points, though. I repeat my orders over and over. That's going to be tough to change. Especially since I never know if he's heard me over his god-awful incessant racket.

  • Nicoleta
    2018-11-14 03:10

    Stil plăcut. Mi s-a părut interesantă abordarea copiilor timizi. Pentru el un copil timid e unul puternic și chiar unul egoist. Nu știam că Freud considera că cei care fumează au rămas la stadiul oral neprimind suficientă stimulare la sân de la mamă.

  • Go2therock
    2018-10-29 01:34

    Years ago I spied a friend reading a book titled, "How to Make Kids Mind Without Losing Your's." I was intrigued ;D, but I never got around to borrowing it.A few weeks ago I saw this book, by the same author, lying in our Library Sale stack. What a gem! Mr. Leman is clear and to the point. A few things I especially appreciated is the way he placed focus on the need your children have for time with you (building relationship.) They might not be conscious of this, either because they are 2, 12, or 20 - but you need to be.The advice he offers for dealing with the trouble you'll run up against is simple, clear, and direct. Initially, he goes through it a day at a time - Monday through Friday; but he offers a number of follow up, easy to grasp, and better yet easy to re-reference sequential reminders. The last part of the book deals with various problem issues on an individual basis. I'll go through these as I need them or when I am in preparation mode - 'cause sometimes you can just see it coming.Every parent needs this book - for their sanity and the sake of their family.Signed, An Experienced Mom Addendum: knocked the star level down one. As I referenced back for a few challenges I've been facing, I found that Mr. Leman was a bit on the light side at times, coming up rather non-directive or (in my opinion) pointing in a direction that wasn't particularly helpful. For example, on the issue of disrespect, the bottom line was to make sure you are treating your children with respect. Ok... now what? Seeing as this is a critical relational issue, among a few others, he got a small demotion from me. But I still love him.

  • Jodi
    2018-11-12 06:22

    Very good, but also VERY difficult to put into practice. Goes against a lot of the general ideas of how a lot of us parent today. I never thought of praising my kids as doing them a disservice, but after reading his thoughts, I agree. Encouragement is good, but that is different than praising, which is what most of us do. The first chapters are about the general principles of his parenting theory, which I would sum up as parents need to stay in control, not get angry, say it once and walk away, then let the consequences of the child's disobedience play itself out. One example: your kid is yelling at you in the car and being disrespectful. You get home and they want to know where their snack is. "Sorry, I don't feel like doing that for you." Eventually they get the point that bad behavior has a consequence. We must follow through! Not always easy though. Another big point: B follows A. You don't get to do B unless A is done. Period. (Often easier said than done!) The remainder of the book is how to handle kid issues, an alphabatized list from fighting to disrespect to getting kid's cell phones to messy bedrooms. I've read a lot of parenting books and one thing I really liked about this was how Leman didn't make me feel like my kid's are awful, I'm a horrible parent, and my family is the only one with issues. In fact, he really paints an accurate picture of parenting, and how hard it is. I felt less alone and more like I was discussing with a group of parents how to deal with these issues we all face. That is in itself very encouraging because often parenting can feel very lonely.

  • Tanya
    2018-10-22 00:11

    Great book with strategies that work to restore order, calm, and RESPECT to a family. Some of the ideas in certain situations strike me as a little harsh, but I also understand that the purpose is to get the child's attention and quickly change negative attitude, character, and behavior. I really like the strategy "B doesn't happen until A is complete." I also like the reminder to not warn/remind children continually: they are smart people! If I don't nag them, there's a greater chance they'll listen and obey the first time I ask. Overall, a helpful read, especially when I begin sliding into wimpy parent mode for whatever reason. I would have loved to have even more examples from parents of how they've implemented the ideas in this book--what worked for them in what situations. I agree with many but not all of the suggestions in the second section of the book, but the author certainly offers many issues for parents to consider--if his take on a particular issue fits a family, it could be great advice. I also don't like how the author sometimes refers to children as rugrats, ankle biters, etc. I know it's his sense of humor, and sometimes it is funny, but I don't think it's respectful of children, and it's a way of thinking that I want to be careful about in my own heart.

  • Sheridan
    2018-11-14 00:27

    On my quest to improve my parenting, I have read many, many, many, many books. A lot were really good, some were just ok. I just read Have a New Kid by Friday by, Dr. Kevin Leman. It was pretty good. I would give it 4 or 5 stars. Easy to read, simple steps to implement, reminders of what really I already know, but it is often so hard to DO what we know we should. I guess I don't know for sure if it works yet, because as we all know, it means I need to change, in order for it to work. Jenn is doing Love and Logic and I think it fits well with that. It is the summer of getting our children to have better behavior. It was well worth checking out Have a New Kid by Friday, of the library and reading. I don't know that it would work great for a 2 years old and younger, but 3 and up, great tools. I also enjoy watching Super Nanny to inspire me to be consistent! Consistency is in the top 10 parenting rules in Have a New Kid by Friday.

  • Adrian Charles
    2018-10-30 23:37

    This book is brilliant in its simplicity and rooted in sound principles. It's a good, quick read for anyone struggling with a strong-willed child, and has the potential to be very helpful. However:- It's strongly rooted in American Christian Conservative cultural values, and may be less palatable to those of other backgrounds;- It makes false assurances of 100% effectiveness that make it sound unnecessarily like snake-oil."Just walk away— your child *will* back down" is advice that succeeds most of the time, but does sometimes fail. Giving no backup plan simply will leave many parents in the lurch.In the end, this is an amusing, effective if well-padded pamphlet of greatest appeal to those who share the author's subculture, and who have enough support to be able to navigate areas that the book fails to address.

  • Helen
    2018-10-31 04:16

    Kevin Leman is a psychologist who has 5 kids and has written 30 books. Here's his scenario: Kid behaves badly, Mum says no to cookies and milk:'"Honey, I told you we're not having cookies and milk today." Matthew was stunned. He opened his mouth to argue, then walked away sadly.'Here's what would happen in real life: Matthew was stunned. He screamed for 2 hours and threw a chair at the wall. Or: Matthew was stunned. He argued all afternoon, all night, and continued arguing until his parents were so exhausted they dropped dead and he ate the cookies.I may exaggerate a little. But I know for damn sure that if I told Miss 6 that if she didn't get dressed quickly she'd have to wear her pyjamas to school she'd say, "fine, and I'm not wearing shoes either!".Say it once, turn your back, walk away? As if.

  • Karin
    2018-10-22 01:19

    What stuck with me the most from this book is: if Dr Leman ever gives you a ride somewhere, you'd better say thank you. At least three times. But spitting out his car windows is a-ok.Seriously, aside from a random rant warning against nursing past one (how does this have anything to do with discipline?) and some rather horrifying advice (lock a kid who refuses to stay in bed outside for 10 minutes) the guiding principle of this book is good (when B, then A). I tried it last night after finishing the book and I was able to stay cool and my kid ended up doing what I wanted without an argument. So worth a read, but read it with a grain of salt and ignore some of the out-there stuff that he includes.

  • Anna
    2018-10-25 22:22

    Despite the fact that I was irked by the audacious claim of a 100% guarantee this parenting method will work in 5 days, I liked this book. The first 1/3 introduced a new strategy for dealing with behavior issues for Monday through Friday. The next 2/3 of the book applied the strategies to specific problems from A-Z (allowances to youth groups). It seems like a version of Love and Logic. It sounds sensible to me and gave me some good tips for dealing with my preschoolers. A lot of this will be more applicable when they are a little older, but it was enjoyable. It's a fast read, too.

  • Belinda
    2018-11-09 01:13

    Think harsh...but very interesting approach. Straightforward, no nonsense. Not too harsh if implemented as soon as child starts to think for himself but pretty harsh if implemented later in life. But it is a really funny read and I actually implemented a few things and got immediate results. I'm waiting for Don to read because he says what I've told him so far goes against my total constitution.

  • Paula Blanton
    2018-10-19 00:23

    I really like Dr. Leman and he has some excellent ideas on raising kids. Only problem that I had was that my child did not always respond to the situation like Dr. Leman thought the child would!! Hence, I did not have a new kid by Friday!! I kind-of liked the kid I have anyway!! Dr. Leman is very entertaining!!

  • Nel
    2018-10-31 06:16

    I like his technique, but sometimes harder to pull off than suggested. Example: I am at home before taking the kids somewhere. The kids start being disobedient, very disobedient. I am feeling claustrophobic in my little house with momentarily disobedient kids. Am I likely to pull the we-are-not-going-anywhere-afterall card? Not likely!! But done right, his techniques are stellar!!

  • Rachel
    2018-10-30 00:22

    I'm still waiting for my new kid to arrive in the mail. My son saw the book and actually asked if we were going to get a new kid. I told him that yes, we were going to get a new kid.....to replace the old ones....he thought that was so funny.Good ideas, helpful info. In all actuality, after reading this book, I realized that my kids are actually GREAT kids afterall! :)

  • Suzanne
    2018-10-27 05:18

    We were so needing a big change around here and my mother-in-law sent this one to us. It is a lot of commonsense information but sometimes we just need to be hit over the head with it for it to sink in. I read this in just a couple of days and started implementing the ideas. Surprisingly we are already seeing a change in our headstrong, difficult child.

  • debra
    2018-11-17 01:30

    Loved this book. Especially when the author actually gives you the actions and words to use in certain situations, not just tell you you need to change and give no direction. Must read for all parents.